Adult Quotes

ATTENTION LADIES - you know how guys say the phrase "Hit it and quit it"? I've got a phrase for us ladies "Hump him and dump him"

Your age doesn't make you an adult...the lessons you've learned, the mistakes you've made, your actions and taking responsibility for your actions DOES!

This attitude is brought to you by the letters F and U!!

good girls blush when they watch porn, bad girls smile cause they know they can do better.

why cant a man ever please a woman? because no man has a willy made of chocolate that ejaculates money

It goes in dry and comes out wet, The longer it's in the stronger it gets it comes out dripping and starts to sag it's not what you think it's a tetly tea bag

....PARKINSON'S OR ALZHEIMER'S... Which one would you rather have? Parkinson's of course! Better to spill half your vodka than forget where the fuck you put it!

remember when someone annoys u it takes 42 muscles in Ur face to frown but it only takes 4 muscles to extend Ur arm and bitch slap that mo Foe upside the head

Here I sit broken-hearted, tried to shit but only farted.  Later on, I took a chance and tried to fart and shit my pants

Says There Are 3 Things That Make A Mans Life MISERABLE~1.) JOB SUCKS 2.) LIFE SUCKS AND 3.) THE WIFE DOESN'T!

misses the days when covering my eyes would make me invisible...