Love: The most fun you can have without laughing.
falling in love is being struck by lightning,
you can no more make it, strike you than
you can avoid it.
Love is an earthquake...
unpredictable, a little scary,
but when the hard part was over
you realize how lucky you are.
Love is like a roller coaster.
Once you had complited the ride,
you want to go again.
Virginity is like a bubble,
one prick and it's all gone
Think of love as a card game:first, get rid of the jokers,
throw away the hearts,
keep the diamonds...
then try to get a king
I recently read that love is
entirely a matter of chemistry.
That must be why my wife
treats me like toxic waste.
An archeologist is the best husband a wife
could ever had, the older she gets
the more interested he is in her.
No man is truly married
until he understands
every word his wife is not saying.
Sex without love is an empty experience,
but as empty experiences go,
it's one of the best.
I married the first man I ever kissed.
When I tell this to my children,
they just about throw up.
Love:
Two minds without a single thought.
I was married by a judge.
I should have asked for a jury.
Love is the answer,
but while you're waiting for the answer,
sex raises some pretty good questions.
Love is like playing the piano.
FRIEND:
A member of the opposite sex
in your acquaintance who has some flaw
which makes sleeping
with him/her totally unappealing.
EASY:
A term used to describe a woman
who has the morals of a man.
If love is blind,
why is lingerie so popular?
Love is temporary insanity
curable by marriage.
I love being married.
It's so great to find one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
Do not marry a man to reform him.
Love - a wildly misunderstood
although highly desirable malfunction of the heart
which weakens the brain,
causes eyes to sparkle,
cheeks to glow,
blood pressure to rise
and the lips to pucker.
Love is
Love is like a little old woman and a little old man
I think men who have a pierced ear
are better prepared for marriage.
They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
Stupid men are the only ones worth knowing,
after all.
The other way to get married is
a lot more fun,
a lot more rational,
and a lot more successful.
It's called dating.
Romantic love is an illusion.
Most of us discover this truth
at the end of a love affair
or else when the sweet emotions
of love lead us into marriage
and then turn down their flames.
If you want me to fall for you,
you got to give me something worth tripping over
you got to give me something worth tripping over
Love is being able to walk arm in arm.
Even when you don't see eye to eye
Even when you don't see eye to eye
falling in love is being struck by lightning,
you can no more make it, strike you than
you can avoid it.
Love is an earthquake...
unpredictable, a little scary,
but when the hard part was over
you realize how lucky you are.
Love is like a roller coaster.
Once you had complited the ride,
you want to go again.
Virginity is like a bubble,
one prick and it's all gone
Think of love as a card game:
throw away the hearts,
keep the diamonds...
then try to get a king
I recently read that love is
entirely a matter of chemistry.
That must be why my wife
treats me like toxic waste.
An archeologist is the best husband a wife
could ever had, the older she gets
the more interested he is in her.
No man is truly married
until he understands
every word his wife is not saying.
Sex without love is an empty experience,
but as empty experiences go,
it's one of the best.
I married the first man I ever kissed.
When I tell this to my children,
they just about throw up.
Love:
Two minds without a single thought.
I was married by a judge.
I should have asked for a jury.
Love is the answer,
but while you're waiting for the answer,
sex raises some pretty good questions.
Love is like playing the piano.
First you must learn to play by the rules,
then you must forget
the rules and play from your heart.
then you must forget
the rules and play from your heart.
Love Is Like Quicksand:
The Deeper You Fall In It
The Harder It Is To Get Out
The Deeper You Fall In It
The Harder It Is To Get Out
FRIEND:
A member of the opposite sex
in your acquaintance who has some flaw
which makes sleeping
with him/her totally unappealing.
EASY:
A term used to describe a woman
who has the morals of a man.
Love is grand;
divorce is a hundred grand.
If love is blind,
why is lingerie so popular?
Love is temporary insanity
curable by marriage.
I love being married.
It's so great to find one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
Love - a wildly misunderstood
although highly desirable malfunction of the heart
which weakens the brain,
causes eyes to sparkle,
cheeks to glow,
blood pressure to rise
and the lips to pucker.
Love is
being stupid together.
We come to love not
by finding a perfect person,
but by learning to see
an imperfect person perfectly.
by finding a perfect person,
but by learning to see
an imperfect person perfectly.
Love is like a little old woman and a little old man
who are still friends even after
they know each other so well
they know each other so well
Love is an ideal thing,
marriage a real thing;
a confusion of the real
with the ideal never goes unpunished.
marriage a real thing;
a confusion of the real
with the ideal never goes unpunished.
Marriage is the triumph of
imagination over intelligence.
Second marriage is the triumph of
hope over experience
imagination over intelligence.
Second marriage is the triumph of
hope over experience
I think men who have a pierced ear
are better prepared for marriage.
They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
Stupid men are the only ones worth knowing,
after all.
Love is an ideal thing,
marriage a real thing.
marriage a real thing.
The other way to get married is
a lot more fun,
a lot more rational,
and a lot more successful.
It's called dating.
A Permission Marketer goes on a date.
If it goes well, the two of them
go on another date.
And then another.
Until, after ten or twelve dates,
both sides can really communicate
with each other about
their needs and desires.
After twenty dates
they meet each other's families.
Finally, after three or four months of dating,
the Permission Marketer proposes marriage.
Permission Marketing is just like dating.
It turns stranger into friends
and friends into lifetime customers.
Many of the rules of dating apply,
and so do many of the benefits.
If it goes well, the two of them
go on another date.
And then another.
Until, after ten or twelve dates,
both sides can really communicate
with each other about
their needs and desires.
After twenty dates
they meet each other's families.
Finally, after three or four months of dating,
the Permission Marketer proposes marriage.
Permission Marketing is just like dating.
It turns stranger into friends
and friends into lifetime customers.
Many of the rules of dating apply,
and so do many of the benefits.
Marriage marks the end of many short follies
- being one long stupidity.
- being one long stupidity.
The longest journey you will ever take
is the 18 inches from your head to your heart.
The eskimo's have 52 words for snow
because it is so special to them;
there ought to be as many for love!
there ought to be as many for love!
Romantic love is an illusion.
Most of us discover this truth
at the end of a love affair
or else when the sweet emotions
of love lead us into marriage
and then turn down their flames.
Keep your eyes wide open before marriage,
half shut afterwards.
A husband is what is left of the lover
after the nerve has been extracted.
A successful marriage requires falling in love many times,
always with the same person
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